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| 05:48pm 12/12/2005 |
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I haven't written in here in forever. I'm a myspace sell out what can I say. I really don't have much to say. Other than the only reason I am updating is because janine sent me a comment telling me to. When she sent me that comment no one really knows haha. Anyway guess i'm writting just to say
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| baby all I want is you |
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| 08:27pm 22/06/2005 |
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I haven't updated in here in forever. I'm sure I have no more livejournal friends left so i'll just write because I am super bored.
What have I been up to in these past months? hummm. Good question because I don't think I have anything exciting to say. Same old shit day in and day out around here. It is summer offically now as of yesterday although you wouldn't know because it still hasn't gotten very hot. I've taken quite a few beach trips already which is fun and just gets me away from here for the day. I'd really like to stay over night or maybe for the weekend sometime this summer but i'm so strapped on money it is insane. Between cell phone bills and car payments and insurance and gettin shit for my car and trying to pay for vacation at the same time I am pretty low on money. It also doesn't help that its now the slow season at work or that they still have not given me the raise they promised me 4 months ago. Today I actually wrote the manager a note telling him that i've talked to every manager for the past 4 months and nothing has been done and i'm fed up and if they no longer want to give me the raise thats fine but the training responsiblilties can be put on someone else because I am done. So yeah. I'm so fucking fed up with that place I seriously think I am leaving soon too along with the dozens of other smart people. I'm hoping to maybe get a job at pseg because my cousin and friend works there but the position is up in the air and I won't know for a couple weeks...ugh. i'm praying that I can possibly get in there because if I did, i'd be set everything would fall into place for me, things would be so much better and i'd be alot happier. so only time will tell. I guess.
I can't wait to leave for vacation. I wish I was going tomorrow i'm so fed up of doing the same thing day in day out week in week out it really becomes so draining on a person and that person=me.
just when I think that something good came along and I might have the chance to be happy everything changes and i'm back to where I started. For one time in my life I want to feel appreciated to feel like someone loves me for me...i don't think that is ever going to happen tho:-/ |
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| YEAHHHHHHHHHHHH |
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| 03:01pm 09/05/2005 |
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You do something to me
that I can't explain
so would I be out of line...
if I said,
I miss you?
I'm pretty bored right now. its 3:00 on monday may 9th. wow. I wish i was working right now.
I have to take my car back into the shop in a couple minutes. Check engine light came on again and although my car is working fine, I payed $400 a month ago to not see that light anymore. Snip Snip I just wish it was incapable of lighting up from now on. Maybe they will do that when i take it back. What a person doesn't know doesn't hurt them aye? This guy better not give me a problem fixing it and gettin that light taken care of or try to charge me or tonight after they close i'll burn his shop down.
Mothers day was yesterday and amazingly I had the best day ever at work. I only worked a morning shift but I made $100 which is awesome. also I have the other $300 to give to denny 3 weeks earlier then it is due. I should have the trip all paid off by june sweeeeeeeeet so I have the rest of the summer to do what i want with my money. HOLLA! :-)
Dave comes home thursday which is exciting because I miss him around here. You know that one friend you have where you can spend time with them doing nothing at all but still leave feeling like it was the best time ever? or someone who you can talk to about everything and anything even if your the type of person who has a hard time opening up and saying how they are feeling? well dave is that friend for me. and even tho he comes home in only 4 days I feel more anxious now for him to come home and i miss him more then I have these 8 and 1/2 months that he has been gone...
::sigh:: Thursday.
Work is going okay. I train everyone and their mom now. This week alone i was training 3 people. lame. Word on the street is my raise has been put into effect but I don't think thats the truth so i'm waiting to see my check on wednesday. I'm def counting the hours of training I have done they are paying me every penny they own me fo real!
haha
that is all.
~T~ |
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| 03:55pm 07/05/2005 |
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HAPPY MOTHERS DAY TO THOSE MOTHERS OUT THERE.
PICTURE OF ME AND MY MOM WHEN I WAS YOUNGER...
=)
that is all.
~T~ |
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| Amazing. |
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| 01:13am 27/04/2005 |
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I'm going to Punta Cana in August for a week! All inclusive
Plane, Hotel, meals, ALCOHOL!. amazing.
Nine people are going.
me-kerri-denny-rob-kevin-ashley-felicia-weston-luis.
Its going to be the vacation of a lifetime.
Heres a sneak peak of where we will be staying. Its like a dream.
-overlooking the whole pool area, the ocean being right behind the palm trees
Another part of the pool area. theres 2 pools they are huge. Including a swim up bar. drinking age is 18. AMEN!
The rooms. Quite eligant I must say! :-)
Going to be fun.
ps-i'm excepting donations to the Tina's goin on vacation fund. any amount helps:-)
~T~ |
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| Friendship only can go so far |
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| 03:39pm 19/04/2005 |
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I fucking hate how people have changed. More so in the last year then anything. I feel as tho i've wasted my time and energy on so many people with nothing to show for it. People I thought were sincere and would always be there for you are instead no where to be found. Tryin to keep up friendships is like pulling teeth for they want nothing to do with you unless it is convienient for them. Fuck that man. I'm tired of everyone more so then ever. I just rather be on my own doing nothing then be around anyone. I feel like i'm living the same day over and over again and I have no escape. Theres just a point where a person gets to where they just stop caring about other people and for the most part I am at that stage with people. My problem is I care about people too much especially for those who don't feel that same way in return. I go out of my way to do things for people or try to keep in contact with people and I get nothing in return and frankly i'm tired of trying its not worth it. I need to center myself around new people and start hanging around a differnt crowd so I don't feel like everyweek is the same fucking thing.
"It's no good trying to keep up old friendships. It's painful for both sides. The fact is, one grows out of people, and the only thing is to face it."
This quote is so very true, one does grow out of people especially when you try and you try to keep up friendships but everytime you go out of ur way for someone they want nothing to do with you and you get to the point where you are just like screw it, its not worth it anymore.
sad but true.
I'm learning not to care.
and its going to be the best lesson i've ever learned.
~T~ |
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| Say goodbye |
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| 06:05pm 13/04/2005 |
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Hum, whats new with me. I just dropped $550 into my car. Sucks but I feel way relieved now and its good knowing I have a car that I can actually drive places now and not have the fear of it blowing up. Its crazy to go from a car that was really old and when something went wrong parts were really cheap also it was an american car so that was cheaper to. Now I have a newer car and on top of that its a german car so parts are way harder to find and more expensive its rough but its my baby and I love it. I'm so picky about everything about it tho especially since its black and smudges and dirty show up on it really bad. One day i'll take pics and i'll post them...one day.
Its april 13th already that is crazy. People come home from school for the summer in like a month or so and thats insane. I'm anxious for dave to come home, it will be good times. I hope. eh. we will see. we will see.
I can't wait til summer. Everything about it I am looking forward to. I had enough of the winter it seemed so much longer than any year before. I can't wait for beach trips and stuff of that nature. Me and Kerri are planning on just gettin away me and her for maybe a couple days because despite us being friends for 14 years we've never done anything of that nature. Mostly because we were never old enough but with her being 21 and me being 20 I think its time for us to do something cool like that. plus she can buy alcohol so why not.
I can't wait. its going to be amazing. |
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| 10:43am 12/04/2005 |
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Your dating personality profile:
Funny - You laugh often. People never accuse you of lacking a sense of humor. You don't take yourself too seriously.
Adventurous - Just sitting around the house is not something that appeals to you. You love to be out trying new things and really experiencing life.
Practical - You are a down-to-earth individual who is not impressed with material excess. You care about the stuff of like that really matters. | Your date match profile:
Funny - You consider a good sense of humor a major necessity in a date. If his jokes make you laugh, he has won your heart.
Outgoing - Shy and timid people are not who you are after. You need someone with a vibrant personality to breathe life into a relationship.
Practical - You are drawn to people who are sensible and smart. Flashy, materialistic people turn you off. You appreciate the simpler side of living. | Your Top Ten Traits
1. Funny
2. Adventurous
3. Practical
4. Sensual
5. Outgoing
6. Liberal
7. Wealthy/Ambitious
8. Athletic
9. Big-Hearted
10. Intellectual
| Your Top Ten Match Traits
1. Funny
2. Outgoing
3. Practical
4. Adventurous
5. Sensual
6. Big-Hearted
7. Athletic
8. Wealthy/Ambitious
9. Conservative
10. Intellectual
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Take the Online Dating Personality Quiz at Dating Diversions
This is very accurate.
Yeah. Weird
~T~ |
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| Whats meant to be will always find its way.... |
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| 01:39am 21/03/2005 |
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Cocktail
?? Which Alcoholic Drink Are You ??
brought to you by Quizilla
Pretty accurate if I do say so myself. The blue drink looks really good too. mmm. anything blue looks good to me. ANYTHING.
I've gotten 5 hours of sleep in the past two days. everyone else has gone to bed and what am I doing. yeah...this. I think my brain might die soon if I don't get some sleep but only time will tell I guess.
I have off the next 2 days which is super cuz I really despise work lately. Not that I don't like seeing everyone I just hate actually serving people. People suck. Its getting old.
I had a weird dream last night that I was on vacation and these 3 guys showed up and the one was totally obsessed with me and wouldn't leave me alone. They followed me on vacation and everywhere I went. I kept rejecting him even tho he was a really nice guy and pretty cute. Although they were kinda stalking me so that could be why. I just now remembered this dream. Idk what it means. hum....
I wanna see the Ring 2 despite me hearing it was bad. Did anyone see it? how was it? I'll have to go see it for myself.
Alright bed time for real now. Goodnight.
~T~ |
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| mystery scratches. |
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| 09:29pm 17/03/2005 |
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So today I woke up with several scratches on me. Two of the worst ones on my right arm about 4 inches in length running along side each other down my arm. I do not know what they are from. I do not have nails, atleast not ones that could possible scratch me and I do not wear any sharp jewerly of any kind. This has happened to me before and in each instance i'm unsure of what causes it. they are noticable to the point where people ask me about them. And although they do not hurt, i'm just really confused as to where they are coming from. The other one was going down my leg but that one has since gone away and the other was on my leg as well but closer to my foot. Does this ever happen to anyone or is it just me? and what could it be?
:-/
~T~ |
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| 05:39pm 16/03/2005 |
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Name: Tina
Birth date: Feb. 1st
Birthplace: South Jersey. The only Jersey.
Current location: P-town
Eye color: Hazel. Sometimes they look green, blue and grey.
Hair color: Currently: Burgundy. Natural: Dirty blonde
Righty or Lefty: righty
Zodiac Sign: Aquarius
ON THE INSIDE
Your heritage: Irish, German, English and Polish.
Shoes you wore today: My work shoes. They are velco. And they are cool.
Your weakness: Gettin depressed a lot.
Your fears: Knives and walking over sewer grates.
Your perfect Pizza: Plain.
YESTERDAY, TODAY, TOMORROW
Your most overused phrase on Aim: haha
Your thoughts waking up: I don't wanna get up ever.
Your best physical feature: I don't have any.
Your bedtime: I don't have a bedtime.
Your most missed memory (ies): Carefree days of childhood.
LAYER FOUR: YOUR PICK
Pepsi or Coke:Coke(w/ jack)
Lipton Ice Tea or Nestea: Lipton
Chocolate or Vanilla: Vanilla
Cappuccino or Coffee: coffee
DO YOU...?
Smoke: on occasion. usually only when I drink. But i wanna stop that.
Cuss: Yeah. not alot but yes.
Single: Yeah single as can be.
Think you've been in love: nope.
Like(d) high school: somedays. others I hated it. I just tried to get out of there, now i wouldn't mind going back.
Want to get married: Someday I hope. But right now it doesn't look good.
Believe in yourself: Not really.
Get motion sickness: I don't think so.
Think you're attractive: nah.
Think you're a health freak: no
Get along with your parents: Ehhh.
Like thunderstorms: Love storms.
Play an instrument: nooooooooooo.
THE PAST MONTH
Drank alcohol: I'd be lying if I said no.
Done a drug: is pot a drug. yes? then yes I have.
Gone on a date: haha. yeah. they should just be like "gone on a disaster" and not call it a date.
Gone to the mall: yes, I hate the mall tho. esp the ones around here.
Been on stage: yeah.
Eaten an entire box of Oreos: No.
Eaten sushi: ew gross
Been dumped: negative.
Gone skating: yes long time ago. skating is the most pointless thing in the world
Gone skinny dipping: nah
Dyed your hair: yes.
Stolen anything: when I was younger.
EVER...
Played a game that required removal of clothing: Nope
Been trashed or extremely intoxicated: yes. oh yes.
Been caught "doing something": nah
Been called a tease?: yea.
Gotten beaten up: no.
Shoplifted: yes
Changed who you were to fit in: no
GETTING OLDER
Age you hope to be married: by 27(which won't happen)
Number of children: 2
Describe your dream wedding: I really don't care. I don't wanna have it in a church tho.
What do you want to be when you grow up?: alive. anything else is a bonus.
IN A GAL/GUY
Best eye color?: I love blue eyes. they make me melt.
Best hair color?: I like dark hair on guys.
Short or Long Hair: In between the both I guess.
Height: any height they just gotta be taller than me which isn't hard
Best first date location: I'm not picky and i'm usually up for anything so he can surprise me.
Articles of Clothing: I like the punk look on guys i think its cute, I also like some preppy styles..yeaaaa
IN THE NUMBERS
Number of people I could trust with my life: Theres not many. Maybe 3. excluding my parents.
Number of CD's I own: not sure. under 50 prolly.
Number of piercings: 9. 6 ears- eye brow-tongue-nose..i want more
Number of tattoos: none. and its staying that way.
Number of times my name has appeared in the newspaper: not many. actually it might be none lol
Number of scars on my body:a couple. 2 of my own doing. looking back that was a bad idea. :-( sad
Number of things in my past that I regret: not much. Theres not point in having regrets. its all a big learning experience. learn from it then move on.
Bored! can you tell? Saw Dave yesterday, not for long tho it was cool. I wish I would of gotten to talk to him for longer, I just wish I would of gotten to talk with just me and him. :-/ grrr. can't do anything about that tho. Billy comes home tomorrow and that is exciting. I love that kid, even if he is a whore hes a really nice guy and I dont get to see him enough so i'm excited to see him. :-) Party tomorrow that javie invited me to. imma stop up for a little bit and check things out, we'll see how that goes. yeah.
thats all.
~T~ |
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| I wanna lay you down in a bed of roses. For tonight, I sleep on a bed of nails. |
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| 08:08pm 12/03/2005 |
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Killing time before I go to yet another party at my cousins. What I thought was a kegger I was going to tonight now turns out to be some kind of Kegger/bday thing for Kevin and weston. So I hopped right over to the Dollar store for a funny little gift for both of them. I got them plastic ass imitation ken doll action figures. its pretty funny actually. I tampered with them a little tho to add to the amusement. Don't think I am a total cheap ass tho. I'm gettin kev sometime for real on his actually birthday on monday. This is just something to get his totally embarassed about when he opens it. You're jealous. I know.
I invited a lot of my friends over tonight however I'm gettin the feeling none of them will come. I haven't got any phone calls today askin me where my cousins house is so thats a sure fire way to know that they prolly aren't coming. I hope they don't decide to wait til I am drunk out of my mind to call and ask for directions because that just won't do.
I didn't work today. Its the first saturday in I don't know how long that I didn't work. It felt really weird having the whole day off and waking up to both my mom and dad being home. I woke up and right away called and made plans with anh to get out of the house. I wasn't gonna miss out on the opportunity of going out on a saturday afternoon. sadly, however I ended up at work having lunch. I realized that when you go in there on your days off and eat you really can't get a minute of peace its like your eating with yoru friend and all your co-workers. its cool tho. I love them all.
I got my car washed today. Car washes scare me, and I know a lot of people feel the same way and i'm gonna say it. Tell me you don't get imtimidated when you have to try and get ur tire into that thing so it takes ur car into it. seriously. I'm always afraid i'll screw up and I'll miss gettin my tire in then the guys will be yellin at me cuz for one i'm a dumbass and two i'm holding up their extremely long line. To my relief the place i went to today made me get out of the car and they did all that for me. I got to walk along this one window and watch my baby go through and get nice and clean. it was awesomeeeeee. YEAH. i feel so good when my car is clean. however no matter how clean it is I always feel like it could be cleaner, and theres a 30 percent chance it will rain tonight. thats pretty sad but its okay cuz I got to see my baby all nice and sexy today! I need to get pics and post them soon, but you know I prolly won't ever do that lol
well i should go now. I've killed enough time I have to go pick up luis and i'm running a little late now.
MUAH!
leave messages
~T~ |
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| you knowwwww |
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| 11:05am 04/03/2005 |
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Party tonight. Should be a lot of fun!
Dave is home on spring break for the week.
i'm excited. wooo
That is all.
Rock on!
~T~ |
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| 10:39am 01/03/2005 |
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Friday night at Bills was a lot of fun. It was great seeing people that I haven't seen in a long time. Hopefully this weekend I can do it all over again.
Heres one pic from that night.
BC and bobert tryin to be pimps.
POP THE COLLAR!
thats all.
~T~ |
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| Sleep seems a dream away, and a year too late. |
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| 12:44am 27/02/2005 |
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I think one of the rudest and most disrespectful things a friend can do to you is intentionally hang up on you while your tryin to talk to them on the phone. Its a friendly/mature characteristic to hear a person out esp a good friend, it should go w/o saying that it is not right.
tonight someone crossed the line.
..and a friendship is dangling by a thread.
i'm mad.
it takes a lot to make me this way.
whatever.
tomorrows another day.
Breath. stretch. shake. let it go.
~T~ |
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| don't push love away. |
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| 05:45pm 18/02/2005 |
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I rarely ever buy anything for myself. I pride myself in being a girl who doesn't go around blowing money on senseless shit like 200 purses or really expensive jeans and stuff of that nature. But, when I do actually go out and buy something I need it feels so great. I get really excited about the stuff I have bought. I went out to the mall the other night and bought a couple shirts for really cheap and it was aweomse. I need new shirts. The ones I have are really old. I also went out today and bought a new pair of jeans because I needed them. Even my work ones are beginning to become unworkable in. and the good pairs I did have, recently suffered rips in the bottoms because I am so short I step on them. and because I needed a good pair of shoes to wear out of work (because all i have is 9$black walmart velco shoes)I also bought these really cute white/silver reebox. they are cute, and a size 6! I didn't think my feet were that small but i guess they are. yay i'm excited.
Drinking over dennys tonight. boys are playing poker, I have no money to play tho, I mean I do but the odds of me winning are slim so i rather just save my money. esp after i bought myself lots of stuff. yeahhhh!
Daves mad we're not coming to visit him tonight. I feel bad but I already have previous plans. He'll have lots of fun without of there anyway. I just don't like the feeling of disappointment among friends. sawwy davie, I love thee.
Thats all. its time for a shower.
Later!
~T~ |
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| "Those who wish to follow me, I welcome with my hands..... |
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| 11:21am 11/02/2005 |
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and the red sun sinks at last into the hills of gold
and peace to this young warrior without the sound of guns.."
So, poconos was awesome, and so was my birthday. Poconos flew by and it was over before i realized it had even started. I had a lot of fun and I think we partied a lot more it seemed on this trip. Every night was different too because more people ended up in the house from 9 to 10 to 11 to 13 up to 15 people. It was cool. I got the drunkest I have ever been on thursday night when we were there. I pretty much passed out. I can't remember a lot of the night which never happens to me...until now I suppose. Another highlight was me and ashley flying off the snowmobile when we hit a jump. I mean completely flying off. Luckly we both went unharmed but out snowmobile kept going until finally stopping on tires on the side of the road. No one at the place would come help us either so us 5 girls had to bam together and lift the snow mobile off the tires and then by some miracle I got it started back up again and we continued to ride around only this time a little bit more causiously. haha. All in all I had a great time, I wish I could live in that house forever its not overly big but its big enough and has everything you would ever need. ::sigh:: As soon as I get some pictures i'll be sure to post them on here for all to see.
other than that, everything is back to the norm. Back to work back to being bored in this town. blah. I was supposed to go visit dave tonight because I haven't seen him in over a month or so, but I feel as tho he doesn't want me to. Atleast not tonight anyway. The reason I get this idea is because when I ask him if he wants me to he doesn't respond. Sometimes he does that when he doesn't wanna hurt anyones feelings he just kinda ignores them in a way. I mean its cool if he doesn't want me to come tonight, I just wish he'd tell me so I knew what I was doing tonight. So, unless I hear otherwise i'm totally free tonight. So lemme know if anyone us up for hanging out! wooo!
Valentines Day is monday. Stupid holiday. Somehow I ended up gettin off from work which is amazing. Not that I have plans or anything cuz I mean why would I? but its good cuz I don't feel like dealing with all the stupid ass couples that come out spend a lot of money on dinner then think that they don't have to tip. Seriously if you can spend 60 bucks on a meal for 2 then you can afford to tip me you fucking idiots. Its not worth it. When they asked me to work and told me they would give me off sunday. I said i would think about it and get back to them, I never got back to them and they ended up assuming I didn't wanna work so put me on for sunday and off monday. Damn straight. assholes.
Valentines Day although overrated and totally cliche, I still can't help but find myself wanting a Valentine. I suppose its because i've never had one. I'm missing out on a lot and it gets more miserable with each passing day. Er. I suppose i'll be my own Valentine...
Time for work
~T~ |
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| Twenty |
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| 03:10pm 01/02/2005 |
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Its my birthday and i'll cry if I want to!!!!
offically the big 20 now.
...it still feels totally weird to say. I'm gettin up there.
I never realized how many friends I had til my phone has been ringing off the hook since 7:45 this morning wishing me a happy birthday. They remember my birthday but they forgot that my ass isn't up that early haha.
I feel loved!
and I'm the happiest i've been in awhile...
Everything seems so right.
Lets hope it lasts.
Poconos tomorrow!
*excitment*
take care while i'm gone everyone!
~T~ |
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| You love me but you don't know who I am.... |
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| 09:27pm 27/01/2005 |
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I should update in here more but I don't wanna bore people with stupid shit.
My birthday is in 5 days. Tuesday to be exact. I turn 20. Wow. Its kind of depressing in a way. I feel old now. I really don't wanna celebrate it and I wasn't until Denise called me up telling me that she is not going to let me not celebrate it...so saturday I am going out. Come one come all!:-)
Poconos on wednesday. I'm excited. Mostly just to get away. I could use some relaxation and gettin away would be a nice change of pace for a couple days. It also helps that everyone in the house is very cool and we should all get along good. I'm content with all the people who are goin at this point. Except now lauren can't go :-( i'm bummed about that. She's an awesome chik and I really enjoy being around her.
Dave sent me my birthday present in the mail today. He bought me a book. He bought me a book by the same author as the one he got me for Xmas. It was a pleasent surprise and awesome of him to do. This will be the first year I won't get to see him on my birthday day. I'm kinda bummed about it but its not that big of a deal we'll make up for it on my 21st!
I need to start packing but I don't know where any of my shit is at. So annoying. The days are winding down tho I suppose I should start being productive! yeah!
Thats all for now. Goodnight all.
~T~ |
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| J-e-t-t-a JETTA! |
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| 10:59pm 19/01/2005 |
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Since my last update a few things have changed. Some bad, Some good. Everything is back to normal now. Well as normal as things can be. Everyone is returning back to school and it kind of sucks. Its a real big tease having people home and then having them go back, but I suppose its the only way things can be. I also got my new car. Yes, offically mine and i'm obsessed and in love with it. Its a 96' VW jetta..black. I bought it with a body kit on it but I have since taken it off and replaced it with the orignal front and back bumper. I feel as tho I did the right/mature thing by taking it off. I know down the line after I spend loads of money getting it painted I would of without thinking went up a driveway or over a bump and tore it right off it was only a matter of time. After hearing what I suspected from the guy that was going to paint my car I thought it best to make a switch and I couldn't of been happier with my decision. I got it back today and they replaced the front and the back painted both, attached them and painted the side skits for $350. Needless to say I didn't go to maaco and decided to go to a better place where i'd get a better job done. I also decided against the whole car being painted because the guy said it was pointless because my paint is in good condition. Instead he told me it would be best to wait til spring and take it to get detailed. For about $120 they will make the outside of my car look shiny and new by using various chemicals and stuff. The minor scratches I do have will virually look gone. They also clean the inside of my car and remove every peice of dirt so I think I'm going to do that. Overall I am very pleased with it and all that is left for me to get done is my right blinker fixed and the front reflectors replaced and Yay! =)
My birthday is in 12 days and it doesn't even feel like it will be my b-day. I'm not planning on doing anything for it at all. Everyone is away at school and its on a tuesday so I figure why even bother. blah. 20. who cares. lets not celebrate it this year.
However poconos is the day after and i'm looking forward to that a lot.
Hopefully it is fun... we'll see I guess.
I have the sudden urge to clean. It might be due to the paint fumes i'm inhaling by sitting in this newly painted hallway/house. mmm
later.
~T~ |
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farfr0msanity's journal